And The Torchettes

This is the last movie in my super short summer slate. A Von Doomed (or Domasheved?) movie before it was even released, a film by Josh Trank and his studio people. It is a reboot of a short-lived franchise that started in 2005, Fantastic Four. Firstly, I was super happy with cast when it was first announced. I remember it being really close to either Batfleck or Eisenberg's Luthor. I mean, Miles Teller is awesome, Kate Mara is amazing as seen in House of Cards, Michael B. Jordan just came off Fruitvale and Chronicle, and Jamie Bell needs some proper recognition. The Jessica Alba-Chris Evans version of Fantastic Four is a pretty low bar to top, so I was pretty confident. Trank made Chronicle and he's the youngest director to have a film open number one in the box office. All seemed well, until principal photography began and we have the news that has since became infamous.

This reboot is set when Reed Richards are still in his pre-university days (I guess? They're still making potato electricity and baking soda volcano. That's like primary school tho). He met Doctor Storm and his adopted daughter Susan and was invited to bring his little science project to a bigger level. He is then joined by Victor Domashev Von Doom, a troubled yet brilliant scientist and Johnny Storm, the biological son of Dr. Storm. They figured out a way of inter-dimensional travel and because of bad decisions they got exposed to a strange energy that gave them powers.

Up until the reviews hit, I was giving Fant4stic the benefit of the doubt. But the abysmal reviews were released and boy, I just had to watch bad movies in cinemas to be objective; I watched Jupiter Ascending in cinemas and I enjoyed it. The buildup to the trip to Planet Zero was good. It had potential and it has a good foundation for a team chemistry. But then the reason for our 'heroes' to go on a trip was based on the notion that this was a drunk decision. That's super stupid. We still had some good sequences on the planet. And I think the film peaked when Reed was trying to check on Ben right after they got back. The film tried to keep the momentum up when we saw them being contained. But then everything went dramatically downhill after the time jump. The time jump was stupid. We missed them as characters and also chemistry-wise. Ben suffered from this the most. I mean, one scene in the 2005 Fantastic Four had more emotion than this whole movie.

I really liked the cast though. They are criminally underused and possibly underappreciated. Not only in their on-screen work. But the fact they still have to promote a film that they haven't seen has to be appreciated. They probably going to hate it but it is their job. The rest of the cast is good too. I like Toby Kebbell in movies I've seen him in like RockNRolla or even Wrath of the Titans. As Doctor Storm, I liked Reg E Cathey. I like him from House of Cards. I also like that despite the horrific and bashed FF films, the always-Doomed franchise is always the most progressive one. The old franchise saw the movies being the first superhero movie to have a black director and the first ever comic-book crossover. This film has a race switch in one of the lead characters (the 2005 films had Ben's gf also race-switched). Also give some credit to Josh Trank who at least we can see his effort to make a watchable film from the first half of the movie. The last battle at the other planet is so badly directed and framed, not to mention the awful CGI. I think the one that's dangerous in this kind of environment might be Simon Kinberg, he's the studio puppy.

Let's talk about the CGI and some of the movie's creative decisions. Why the fuck doesn't The Thing wear any pants? Why don't we have more insight to Ben Grimm's life? Why was he hitting his own name with a baseball in the trailers? Why does he play baseball? Why does the CGI so bad all over the film? Why doesn't Miles Teller show any sign of enthusiasm and spirit in the last battle? Why do we have so many deleted scenes? Why is the mysterious alien energy was green in color? Why doesn't Doc Doom explodes the team's head if he could? Why did Doc Doom die if his the big baddie? Did Doom die so the franchise could be saved? Is Toby Kebbell available for his comments? Why doesn't Fox give more money for the movie's budget? Why didn't Josh Trank exit the film when his vision was tampered? Why Why Why? I got frustrated with this movie so bad. At the end of the movie, I genuinely thought, that was actually passable. And then I got thinking about the movie and how it free-fell halfway the movie. It was frustrating to have an exciting buildup but jackshit materialized instead. Fantastic Four (what happened to the The in the title by the way?): rated 1/4 [this is so low, I haven't rated a movie this low for so long]

Let's add the rough cut version of this movie to the short list of movies I want to see but probably never would. So far the list only includes World War Z with the war ending.

Whenever you have a bad day or you're forced to do something you don't want to do: just remember Josh Trank had to do damage control for a film he doesn't believe in anymore. Look at his face. That's the I'm-willing-to-say-anything-to-get-paid-and-get-the-fuck-out-of-here face.

Summer Sweep

Sorry for being away for more than a month. Although no one seems to be counting or missing me (in this blog). I had a busy camp throughout August, followed by a week-long holiday in the capital city, and in the September, those were just me being a total couch potato or more accurately, bed potato. To be fair, I had a lot of part-time work too. So I'm not a total lazy ass bitch. More importantly, I watched a couple of summer films throughout the rest of my summer and here are their short reviewsss. Spoiler alert, I mostly liked them all like usual.

Southpaw
This film has one of the best leading actors of the year. Jake Gyllenhaal is having his own Gyllenhasance (you heard this term first here) following his Oscar snub for his intense performance in Nightcrawler. Also in the cast is Rachel McAdams in a very different role. She's also opting to challenge the typecast against her by playing strong women as seen in this film and also True Detective season 2. Despite strong performances by everyone, the film is bogged down by cliched boxing drama story. Even the drama dragged a bit too long. If it weren't for Gyllenhaal and Forest Whitaker, this film could be unwatchable. Antoine Fuqua's direction is confident, then again the story written by Sons of Anarchy creator Kurt Sutter might be too heavy for the film in overall. Southpaw: rated 2.5/4

Inside Out
I'm so happy that I could see this film in the cinemas. I was already giving up because the film was only shown in its dubbed version, then I went to the capital city and all is well again. After skipping 2014, Pixar made a great comeback after a pretty lackluster couple of years (Cars 2? Monsters U? Anyone?). Pixar excels at bringing out emotions in their films so they went basic and made a film out of emotions. The film hits your heart even before it started, with the sweet short Lava. The actual film is unexpected, smart and funny. It literalizes (is this a word) the stuff you usually say like Train of Thoughts. The film establishes its world smoothly and then play along with the concept greatly. There's also a great breakout star in the character of Bing Bong who's responsible for waterfall-like tears that's hasn't been seen since the ending of Toy Story 3. The only downside is that the film feels isolated and isn't explored much. It feels small compared to most of Pixar films. It even feels small compared to Cars. That's my only complaint, but hey maybe they succeeded in making a small film. Oh fun fact: the film is retitled as Inside Head in Japan. Inside Out: rated 3.5/4

San Andreas
In terms of pleasure, fun and loudness, San Andreas is the best summer movie of the year. Erasing his WWE origins for good, Dwayne Johnson has emerged as one of the most reliable Hollywood action stars lately. At least three franchises has undergone 'The Rock Treatment' for the better (Fast & Furious franchise, Journey films, and--highly debatable--G.I. Joe films). It's just probably fair to give Johnson a studio summer tentpole film to showcase his eyebrows, biceps and acting prowess. He had Hercules last year, but that film is devoid of any fun. The film may not be as iconic as Roland Emmerich disaster films but it is fun in its own way. The story is the cliched-broken-family-reunites-in-the-wake-of-disaster as seen in 2012 most recently but that so-called "disaster film to end disaster film" is too melodramatic. Whereas San Andreas delivers on spectacle and intensity. It has an awesome one-take sequence with Carla Gugino during an earthquake. The cast is pretty cool too. Aside from The Rock and Gugino, the film has Alexandra 'baby blue eyes' Daddario, Ioan Gruffud, and Paul Giamatti. The film is awesome, that's all. You don't need to worry much about story in this kind of film. You just need to be entertained, and this film does even more than fulfilling your needs. San Andreas: rated 3.5/4

Spy

Spy is definitely the funniest movie of the summer. I'm not surprised if it eventually be the funniest movie of the year. Melissa McCarthy stars in the movie with a stellar cast that includes Jude Law, Jason Statham, Rose Byrne, Bobby Cannavale, Allison Janney, Miranda Hart and a very very brief Morena Baccarin. The film could end up unfunny like Steve Carell/Anne Hathaway's Get Smart which just borderline silly and stupid. What worked in Spy is that it is not a spoof, it is a comedic spy film, like Jump Street films but more women-centric. So the action scenes are treated as an action scene in an action film and the logic of the narrative too, despite it being a basic/template spy movie story with stolen nuclear mumbojumbo going to be used to bomb the world or stuff. Jason Statham went full comedy and boasting nonsensical lines is one of the many highlights of the film. Melissa McCarthy's tough ass lines are also hilarious. Rose Byrne once again proved that she has an overabundance of talent that is still untapped. McCarthy-wise, the film is not as funny as Bridesmaids, which I just watched right after seeing this film. But for 2015, it's a pretty funny movie and I hardly react that much to a comedy film. Spy: rated 3/4

Pitch Perfect 2
Girl power! This is the sequel to the surprise hit and crowd-pleaser Pitch Perfect which also is responsible for kids around the world playing with their cups during dinner. The film is now directed by Elizabeth Banks who did a pretty great job for a first timer. The film is basically the same with the first one. It is still widely unfocused. The story is everywhere. The jokes doesn't always work. Beca's character is so different and quite unrelatable. However, what it lacks is improved by the stellar acapella performances. Not only from The Barden Bellas, but there's this incredible German group Das Sound Machine who covers Fall Out Boy's My Song Know What You Did In The Dark. It's rooftop-blowing awesome. There's also a great sequence featuring great names in acapella music like Pentatonix and Filharmonic singing Anyway You Want It. And as usual the Rif-Off is greattt. There's also nice surprises from the smaller roles like Bella newcomer Hailee Steinfeld, the scene-stealer Keegan Michael Key and a cameo by Snoop Dogg. The film may not show up as anyone's all time favorite, but we watch the film for its pleasant atmosphere and great singing. Pitch Perfect 2: rated 2.5/4

Ant-Man

Marvel's Phase 2 ender is their smallest hero to date. Paul Rudd stars as Scott Lang, a con artist who's "drafted" to be next Ant-Man by the original hero Hank Pym played by Michael Douglas. The film took the DCEU approach by establishing that Ant-Man is already around. So it's more like a quasi-origins film. We all know the behind-the-scene drama which resulted in Edgar Wright's exit and eventually Patrick Wilson too. But I'll try to review the film objectively without that issue in mind. The film is Marvel's second funniest film so far (for me Guardians of the Galaxy is super hilarious), but not because of the lead actor. That credit goes to Michael Pena for playing a straight-up chillin Hispanic character that is rich and dare I say, embracing the stereotype silliness but with so much flair and style. I like Corey Stoll but his villainy is very much wasted in the film. I hate Marvel sometimes for not respecting the villains. I mean, the hero could be good if the villain is really cruel. The opening scene with a de-aged Michael Douglas is great by the way, I just had to mention it. I really like Michael Douglas' role as the mentor in the film. Evangeline Lilly is always badass. Overall, the cast is craycray. It also features Bobby Cannavale and Judy Greer in small roles. The film is imaginative in its visual but not so much in the narrative. The film isn't confident enough to stand on its own that it had to namedrop The Avengers and feature a fight scene with a B-grade Avenger. Ant-Man: rated 3/4

More to come
- Heroes Reborn rant
- Fantastic Four review
- Summer Recap

I need to absolve myself  for not posting anything on September. You'll be seeing a lot of me.

Should You Choose To Accept It.. For The Fifth Time

Tom Cruise might be my favorite actor of all time. He's just so good. He's the true Hollywood star of our times. He's so recognizable. If I say Chris Pratt or Christian Bale to some random people, they might not know them. But names like Tom Cruise or Leonardo DiCaprio are the ones that keep Hollywood running. So, Tom Cruise is back this year after last year's sci-fi action spectacular Edge of Tomorrow with Emily Blunt. He's now in his flagship franchise's installment number five, Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation. He's joined with his frequent collaborator Christopher McQuarrie who directed him in Jack Reacher. The returning cast include Ving Rhames, Jeremy Renner and Simon Pegg. Newcomers here are Rebecca Ferguson and Alec Baldwin. I'm pretty excited to see this film although my excitement isn't going through the roof. We're still pretty surprised it got moved five months earlier than the original date.

Ethan Hunt and his crew are on a mission to track down a rogue organization called The Syndicate who's main objective is to infiltrate and destroy spy and intel agencies such as IMF (not the International Monetary Fund). In the meantime, the IMF are undergoing an inspection from CIA for its missions that had ruined things, causing mayhem all over the globe. Ethan Hunt is then, once again,  disavowed and became an international fugitive for CIA while also doing his own mission to stop The Syndicate once and for all.

I'd like to think the Mission: Impossible sequels peaked with J.J. Abrams' installment number three. That is still my favorite apart from the first one. We do not go to Mission: Impossible for a very intricate spy story right? You go for the thrill and spectacle, which Ghost Protocol delivered. Rogue Nation, in my opinion, laid out its story really well. Kudos to McQuarrie, he always write the good stories. However, I think this installment lacked the spectacle and thrill. John Woo's M:I-2 also suffered the same thing. The great stunt was at the beginning, Woo's no-harness rock-climbing is this movie's hanging-on-a-flying-plane sequence. After that, the movie could only hang on to story and below-Mission: Impossible-standard action scenes. I'm not bashing the movie, it has its moments. McQuarrie's really good at staging and directing chase scenes like the one we previously saw in Jack Reacher. The underwater computer thingy-sequence was also thrilling, although the actual technicality of the computer is so over-the-top. The opera scene is also top-notch. Sadly, for a Mission: Impossible movie those are not enough. I think Ghost Protocol made up its lack in plot with the action scenes, like 70:30 for action and story, while this one has an 40:60 ratio of action and story

Tom Cruise delivered his best as always. The rest of the cast too, although not enough action for both Renner and Rhames, (it's probably either more in Age of Ultron or in this movie for Renner) and Pegg isn't as funny as before. The breakout star here is Rebecca Ferguson who played Ilsa Faust. Also commendable is the composer Joe Kraemer whose works are mostly on television but amazingly mixed the iconic Mission Impossible theme with action score that really works. I like this movie for the fact it doesn't rely on the characters hanging on a rope or just hanging two inches from the floor. The first three movies have Tom Cruise doing that and the fourth has Jeremy Renner doing it. Also after being criminally unused in Ghost Protocol, it is the return of the masks! YES (Oops probably that's a spoiler). Also Tom Cruise name-dropped Jakarta! Movie number six, go there! I like the very well-directed action scenes, the locations, the casts. It's a very good movie actually, but it's just a few steps shy for being a great Mission: Impossible movie. The best sequel is still M:I:3. But still, thank you Tom Cruise and Christopher McQuarrie for giving us a blast this summer. Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation: rated 3.5/4


Oh, and I also watched Jurassic World for the second time and I am not bored yet!
PS. might disappear for like two weeks. But will return in gloryyy
[cue John Legend and Common's Glory]

The World Is Yours

If you ask me, I will claim that I was the biggest dinosaur fan that's ever lived. I used to know all the species of dinosaurs spanning from the Triassic Period to Cretaceous Period. That's all thanks to my parents' shoving me Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park during my early ages. That film remains one of my favorite movies up until now. Ergh enough with this introduction. I can't contain it. Jurassic World is unexpectedly very good. Probably you saw me bashing the trailers some eight months ago. The trailers were shit. They make the actual movie seems bad but in fact it didn't. I would totally be sold to watch the movie if it's just a montage of people staring at things and being scared with the haunting piano rendition of the theme song. This installment of the Jurassic Park franchise is now directed by Colin Trevorrow, whose film Safety Not Guaranteed is, for me, quite an unbearable experience although that's mostly because of my dislike of Aubrey Plaza. The movie stars Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard in the main roles, and also adding pleasant surprises like Jake Johnson, Vincent 'Kingpin' D'Onofrio, and Omar Sy from The Intouchables.

The film starts with us following the two brothers, Zach and Grey(?--yeah, they're just these two boys), whose on an independent trip to the now-very popular theme park, Jurassic World. Their aunt, Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) is working at the park trying to unveil a new addition to the park: a genetically modified hybrid dinosaur. Owen (Peter Quill), who's also working at the park as a raptor wrangler, is concerned about the fact that this hybrid species might be dangerous as an attraction.

As I've said before, I love this movie. Let's be honest, it probably won't be as iconic as the original. But they're not trying to match it. It's a very notable addition to the franchise. They treated the original material respectfully, unlike that other franchise which has killer robots from the future in it. It really feels that this movie is made with love and care from the people who admire and respect the previous films. I like the easter eggs in the film with Ian Malcolm's book, the vibrating cellphone scene, inGen squad, Spinosaur skeleton, etc. Trevorrow even politely said that the events in the two sequels before are sidelined, instead of disregarded. The music by Michael Giacchino is also one of the indicators. It evokes nostalgia while also infusing new ideas. And don't you just love Giacchino's track names? For example, "Gyrosphere of Influence" or "Nine to Survival Job". The trailers released for the film didn't do the film justice. The good story ideas from the film were mixed without care for the trailers making it nonsensical to see within two and a half minutes. The movie mixed and nurtured all the plot points really nicely. Like Chris Pratt's raptor hunt together or the fact that we need a genetically modified hybrid. It has a very light tone to the film which makes it fun and not boring despite all the science talk. It infuses the right amount of jokes also at the right place. Unlike say, Iron Man 3 which most of the jokes didn't work at all. The effects are awesome in overall, but at some parts it still felt like a bad render that only passes for Terra Nova. It is mind-boggling the fact that the effects in Jurassic Park still holds up up until today.

Indominus Rex, despite the silly-ass name (Unobtanium-level of dumb name-giving), is pretty awesome and terrifying in all the right ways. The attractions shown in Jurassic World are crazy good. The Mosasaurus is so cool, despite passable vfx. The characters are awesome. I like Chris Pratt's Owen Grady, he's cool and Chris Pratt infuses a considerable amount of persona to make that character alive--not just a tough guy. And finally Bryce Dallas Howard gets the fame she deserves. She deserved it since The Village and also after her brief role as Gwen Stacy in Spider-Man 3, although Emma Stone kinda stole Gwen Stacy away from her. I always like her in every movie, like The Help or even Terminator Salvation. Jake Johnson is also another star in the movie. Nick Miller finally finds work! And he's just so funny. He also has the best lines about Jurassic Park being way better than Jurassic World. The last battle between the dinosaurs is so good it even put last year's Godzilla to shame. Probably for the fact it is better lit. Bottom line, I like this movie more than I should. It's thrilling, it's funny, it's awesome, it's up there with Mad Max: Fury Road as one of the best movies of the summer. Jurassic World: rated 4/4

Should you choose to accept it, Rogue Nation review is coming up next.

[cue theme song]

Don't Tamper With My Fried Chicken!

I love chicken. I love fried chicken. I love Kentucky Fried Chicken for its finger-licking goodness. I love A&W's fried chicken for its amazing taste that's so original. I love the Indonesian McDonald's fried chicken for its artificial taste. I love the traditional Indonesian fried chicken. I love the Japanese karaage. Bottomline, fried chicken is one of my favorite food of all time. Imma let you finish, but it is one of the best food ever created by mankind. But I wouldn't eat fried chicken everyday, that's unhealthy and it makes you sick. Unlike pizza which I would happily eat everyday. Fried chicken's' a guilty pleasure, much like The Amazing Spider-Man 2.

I feel bad for TASM 2, really I do. Don't you? No one asked for The Amazing Spider-Man and I personally hate people who think that Tobey Maguire is a bad Peter Parker/Spider-Man. When I was researching for this post (yes guys, even blog posts need research), Andrew Garfield just scored major respect points from me. During TASM2 Comic-con panel in 2013, he said and I paraphrased that Spider-Man would forever be Tobey's role no matter what. YES. Huge respect. The young actors involved in the rebooted franchise are the reason you go to see the films despite them being lackluster.

Let's start in 2012, I hated TASM so much. It was actually well-filmed and it has its own unique moments (I counted two) but the repetition and unnecessariness of the whole film bogged it down big time. But come TASM2 in 2014, it was tasked with the job of world-building and setting up future installments. It was doomed from the start but the film turned out pretty fine. The action scenes are amazing and Spidey's new costume is just so beautiful. Remember that set-piece in Times Square when Electro faces Spider-Man for the first time? I'd go out on a limb and say that scene is a master-class in superhero blockbuster filmmaking. But how was the rest of the film? I'd like to plagiarize my old post to proceed.

TASM2's positives
1. We've warmed up to this hipster version of Peter Parker.
2. Trifecta of great young actors: Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone and Dane DeHaan. Also add the now-Oscar-nominated actress Felicity Jones in the mix. I once tweeted that this group is The Social Network cast equivalent of superhero movies. And this film should've featured Shailene Woodley also. That would be mind-blowing.
3. Marc Webb's more assured direction. His web-slinging scenes are way better than before and action scenes are pretty flawless. The death of Gwen Stacy is also handled masterfully. I still jumped in shock everytime she hit the ground even after three times watching the movie.
4. Hans Zimmer & Co.'s new hopeful theme and Electro theme are killerrrr.
5. The film is lighter than Marvel and even DC. See how Spidey's gleeful persona influenced the other characters to also be comical, whether intentionally or unintentionally. For example, Max Dillon, The Rhino and Dr. Kafka, yet people complained about this. why..

TASM2's negatives
1. Too much important scenes that are deleted. Go search on YouTube for those scenes because they make the movie way better.
2. Too much Peter & Gwen. It goes to the point where it's boring. They have chemistry yes, but do you want to see two lovers going on a date all night? No.
3. Chosen one-type of storyline. Peter Parker's supposed to be you, me, us. In this movie, he's like Neo or Harry Potter. Even Harry Potter has more relatable traits to people than this Peter Parker.
4. Cramming too much backstories. Like, Harry Osborn is actually a long lost childhood friend or Electro's sudden shift from Spidey fanboy to hater or that Peter's dad's hulaballooo.
5. False advertising, like featuring The Rhino like he's one of the main villain. Or more precisely, bad advertising for revealing too much in the trailer.
6. Being a flop and eventually rebooted by Marvel.

I actually want to see this franchise completed. At least, let them resolve some of the stuff that are happening, like Peter's hunt for Uncle Ben's killer, that Pierce guy, the villains gallery. I could write a story that makes them finish at installment number three. At least give us, audience, closure. I'd like to see Felicity Jones as Black Cat. I'd like to see more Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man. Those Marvel guys, they only think about themselves. They could work Andrew Garfield's Spidey into MCU, they're just too lazy, too arrogant. They can address this film's flaws and still make a decent tie-in to Civil War.

I hate it when you tamper with my guilty pleasure. This is like eating half of a fried chicken and then some cleaning lady threw your chicken away and the store's already closed. Look at this Marvel, I can even work my way to making metaphors using fried chicken for a movie. Why can't you? (Work TASM's universe to MCU, not inserting fried chickens to MCU.. Shawarma's good although overrated).

Still coming: Jurassic World review. In fact, I'm gonna take a bath and go to the cinemas..NOW